Typhoon Haiyan Relief Effort: Retrieval and Burial

Rescue Net informed us where they were searching for the dead. I remember trying to mentally prepare myself for this. Words of warning and caution rung in my mind from concerned friends and family members about seeing these kinds of true horrors. I remembered my sister's greater fears were not that I was going to be harmed by desperate survivors, but that my mind's innocence would be corrupted with the disturbing images of death and tragedy -- to be forever changed by the experience. To have a piece of my positivity or optimism tainted with the realities of calamity and destruction. I thought of war veterans or those who have PTSD from traumatic experiences and wondered if this was going to be similar to that.

I didn't feel fear, I didn't worry about my well being, I just thought about the job that needed to get done. These cadavers were cultures for disease and parasites. They were a danger to the health of the survivors and I considered the work I was about to do as simply a service to those who remained. The more I tried to think about it the more thoughts were displaced from my mind. Actions became automatic and a numbing buffer was placed in my mind. The last thought that came was one for Chantel's welfare. I looked back to see her talking to Mum Beth who had taken her as her companion. She had ignored my requests for any sort of additional arm, head, or neck covering. I smirked and turned forward. She was provided for, she was protected, I was protected, we all were protected. We were here on God's errand and we would not be hindered, we would not be harmed, we were provided for.

We walked off the street and down past the remains of the roadside homes into the jungle debris. We had to climb over and under the fallen palm trees. We saw the first cadaver -- a man with only his stomach exposed with the rest of his body buried. We flagged the corpse and continued on. We saw the two Rescue Net volunteers geared out head to toe wearing gas-like masks walking towards us. They pointed back the way they came. We saw some Filipinos waving at us so we followed them. Two bodies were bagged and ready to be carried. Four of us took corners of the black bag and lifted. The body was heavy and required a lot of strength to carry. We wrapped the handles around our hands and wrists and started up and over the debris the way we came. We struggled and worked to get this victim to the road. We made it back and laid the body in its bag on the side of the road before walking back into the jungle to be picked up by the military.

This process repeated a few times. This work was much different than the day before. There was an air of somber solemnity as we carried the dead. Jokes, laughter, and light-mindedness became absent from our usual conversing. We were much more quiet and with respect for our dead brothers and sisters. It was difficult to comprehend the reality of the work we were doing. I felt disconnected and almost out-of-body. I didn't feel much, the burn perhaps of the muscles in my arms. I didn't feel the heat of the day, I didn't feel the obvious thirst that comes from the dehydrating sun and work, the sadness, the mourning, the disturbance, the hunger, the expected shock... No, I just worked. Where is the next cadaver, the next step to avoid tripping. My thoughts and feelings were minimal.

We returned to our small camp on the side of the road. I looked for Chantel who's head was down and her eyes were squinting in the bright sun. I went to her and asked her how she was feeling. She said her fever had receded some but that she was still feeling tired and weak, but that she was ok. I offered her some food. I told her to take care and to try and stay out of the sun. I was called by Brylle over to where Olsen and the others were. Rescue Net needed help bagging the bodies in another area. We split up into two teams, Olsen with three or four and the same amount with me. Some locals came with us.

When I came home people asked how we found the bodies. We followed our nose. Despite our surgical masks the smell of death was inescapable. It stings the senses, it is sharp, and causes you to recoil. Proceeding was battling biological intuition -- the built in sensor to avoid the dangerous effects of decomposing flesh. Olsen's team was guided almost immediately to a large man buried in a swamp. My team began climbing a land bridge made of toppled homes and fallen trees. It gapped a blackened pool of stagnant water. A body could be seen floating in its depths. It was irretrievable. We were ill equipped as is. We were using surgical gloves and masks that were bought from Wal-Mart. It wasn't until after our trip did I realize how dangerous the work was that we were doing with the lack of protective gear we had. Olsen was wearing a t-shirt with arms exposed and no head/eye protection. We climbed sheets of wrecked aluminum and wood and made our way to a caved in home. We found a woman upside down with her legs trapped between the roof and the debris underneath. He head was buried in rubble revealing only her torso. We got to work lifting off the trees and debris weighing down the roof that trapped her body.

After some time had passed Olsen and a few others scaled the debris to assist in freeing this woman. Finally a door was exposed that I used as leverage to lift the remains. I summoned all my strength and with Olsen pushed the roof off of the woman. Olsen and another held it while I grabbed the woman's thigh and flipped her over rightwards. Her leg had been decaying for over a week and was soft and jelly like. The stench of rot and decay was difficult to tolerate. We unearthed the rest of her body and head which revealed a morbid face, half flesh, half skull squirming with maggots and other flesh eaters. She was recognizable as a nanay (an older woman) and a likely mother. Though haunting this experience was it did not startle me. I was unperturbed as I mentioned before. I remember her face... and looking back it was indeed horrifying, but in the moment I was numb and uninfluenced. I sat down as I caught my breath and the rest of the crew placed her into the body bag. We had to travel a long ways around to avoid the swamp. 

As we returned to the street a media crew was there complete with interviewers and photographers. A video recorder was filming us walk back to our positions. I was pretty upset by there presence. Why were these people here before the Red Cross? The LDS Humanitarian Relief Effort? The Salvation Army? Did they bring supplies for the survivors? What are they here for? They asked for our photos. I looked at Olsen with eyes sharp but pleading. This wasn't right. We shouldn't be glorified for this. These fallen brothers and sisters need not be exposed. I kept my mask on and lowered my bandana. We congregated next to those we had carried as ZEDRU stood with us. They captured only our sober eyes and somber faces.

As I look at this photo I notice that it is raining. I don't remember it raining... I didn't feel the rain.