So, Elder Olsen did get transferred...dangit. He's re-opening and training in a re-opened area. My new companion is Elder Sudaria. We went on splits once in Ibaan when I was in Lipa. I was called as senior...I'm a senior. wow, I can finally do everything my way, the right way, like actually study, and plan, and use preach my gospel, and read the white handbook, and have comp inventory, and help out my comp who is struggling a little bit...YES! woohoo! I was so grateful and stoked!
Till I broke my foot.
Ankle, I broke my
ankle playing basketball. I rolled it bad when sidestepping and it
fractured a little bone. I'm in a cast now made of concrete. Legitimately
concrete. when they put the thing on, they took out a package and
dipped it in water. It was grey like concrete, and then it solidified on
my foot. It's concrete. The thing is freaking heavy. like 8-10
pounds. It hurts like a fetch, and the pain pills give me stomach
problems. So...I was off my foot with my comp at home for about a week
and a half. He would leave me sitting alone by myself with my foot on a
chair unable to walk (no crutches yet) to go to a computer shop and play
video games. One day he was gone 9 hours. The Z.L.s who we live with
talked to him about it, and then even the A.P.s did, but he just doesn't
care. Turmoil started gripping my chest, even guilt, I started losing
hope. I wanted so badly to help my comp, I felt I was failing the
President for not fulfilling my purpose to my companion, and obviously
my comp refused to work with ward missionaries and would leave to play
video games instead. So I suffered deeply about the work...I just wanted
the work to progress. I felt helpless...and I was.
This is when I learned to give it to God. I sat one day
pondering deeply about what I could possibly do to help the situation.
There was nothing I could do but pray. I was not in a good state of
mind, I didn't even want to pray, but knew I needed to. I bowed my head
and just plead for God's will be done for my comp, and to reveal the
purpose of all these things happening so I could just try to help and
contribute. I received a powerful revelation about my interaction with
God's will, it was based off an analogy I gave in a workshop about
obedience a few weeks past. Basically there are times where we just need
to trust God, and even when we try to help we are just frustrating our
progress. Sometimes we just need to let God handle it, and just ensure
we are doing the basics instead of trying to interfere. It prompted me
to submit, to give it up, to hand it over to him...which I did. I sat
with silent tears running down my cheeks as I submitted my will to the
father entirely for the very first time. I then discovered one of the
reasons that all this was happening, I had made a true connection of
trust with my father. These days since have been so much lighter,
happier, filled with so much more light, even in such a depressing
circumstance there are times I can't help but smile and realize that
God's got it under control. Its such a relief, he took this burden from
me. 
This still does not help the boredom and loneliness, but
God has sent angels to watch over me. One of my recent converts Ian has
visited me almost daily. A ward mission leader named Francis comes over
every now and again to play monopoly. These are unprecedented visits,
but how needed they are. God is always with us in a darkest times, I
know this, it has become truth, and I know that no matter what happens, I
can just know that God's got it. Its hard to explain.So zone con is on Thursday, we will be staying the night in a different zone for a special interview with the President on Friday. It will be interesting to see what happens. I find comfort in knowing God's Will, will be done.
I love you all, My mission means everything to me, and though trials may come, lets just keep calm and carry on
-Elder Mace
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